Greetings
We live in a fast-paced society, there is no denying it. Greetings are a product of that society. What used to be "Good afternoon, and how are you doing today?" Has become "what's up?" or "how you doin'?". In some circles, greetings can be no more than one syllable in length; which gives rise to grunted, cro-magnon-esque forms of acknowledgement like "s'up", "yo" and "hey". Not to mention the people who regularly move faster than the speed of sound, and therefore cannot use verbal greetings; you are lucky to get an eyeshot and maybe a slight head nod from a person like that.
Not only has the greeting been shortened, but the time alloted to giving and receiving greetings has become so small that it is quite common for there to be no response to the question posed by the greeting, except for another greeting in the form of a reponseless question. This casting of a question without expectation or desire of a response bothers me. Why ask someone how they are or what they are up to if you don't care enough or don't have time enough to stop and wait for any kind of a response. Instead people throw the greeting out in haste, without even slowing down to pass you in the hall; without pausing as they continue down the stairs.
And have you ever heard or been a part of a botched quick greeting? Depending on how badly misexecuted, this can be so awkward as to make you squirm. Someone says "how's it going?" and the other person, either because of culture or class ignorance or misunderstanding, attempts to respond in a meaningful way, sometimes starting a full blown unwanted conversation. "It's going pretty well, it's a nice day. How are you?" comes the response from the greeting-newbie. The person who intiated the greeting walks away quickly, pretending not to hear the question, pretending that they did not recognize the budding of a conversation, or that no response was necessary. The person who attempted to reply is left wondering what just happened.
In today's world, greetings can get ugly. But I believe there is a better way. We obviously don't have time to stop and have a conversation everytime we meet someone, but we can do better than throwing around a bunch of unanswered questions. If we have time to pose the question but not answer it, why not just greet people with the answers to the questions they're always asking? The next time you're passing by someone you know, just say "sad" or "happy" or "pissed" or whatever you are; or "going to lunch" or "running out" or whatever you're doing. The question is superfluous. Besides, that person probably asked it to you a thousand times before, without ever hearing the answer. The greeting takes no longer, but this way they actually learn something about your current state. Plus, if you say "sad" and they don't bother to call you up later to see what's wrong, then you know they're an asshole.
Face it, the question simply isn't needed. There are only so many that are asked anyway, so if you greet someone with an answer, the question you're responding to is obvious. So when you see a coworker rushing down the hall, or you wisk pass a friend on the street, or you answer the phone while weaving in and out of traffic on the highway, just go ahead and answer the question.
